It took me years to buy one. All those years with a flip phone, a primitive device only good for talking and texting. Eventually, the ease of processing credit cards through Square and an unfortunate washing machine accident resulted in my purchasing of a smart phone. I won't be like everyone else I said. After all, I'd witnessed how people eschewed conversation, the beauty of nature, quiet observation, and obstacles in their path to pay attention to their phone. I didn't get it. What happened to our attention spans? Did we really need to be on the internet all the time? Could we not take a minute of boredom?
I understand now.
The minute I have a question, I think "I'll look that up on google." The minute I have nothing to do, I hop on Reddit and see what's on the front page. When I hit the weights, I take my phone with me, so that I can use it to calculate my percentages as well as keep myself entertained in between sets. It's an alarm clock, a weather forecaster, a repository for all of my data and precious things. It's a goddamn vampire is what it is.
Somehow, my smart phone has made itself essential despite being a thing I lived without for almost the entirety of my life.
What it does is never let me disconnect from the internet. The internet is a cruel place, a techno-capitalist nightmare of garish design and ADHD distraction. I'm starting to quote people from Reddit like they're real flesh and blood people. Which they are. But I don't know them.
Can't we sacrifice convenience for a little bit of humanity in return? Can't we turn back the clock and decided "hey, maybe it's not great to always carry the internet around in our pocket." The answer, of course, is no. People love their smart phones. They spend hundreds of dollars on them.
I want to toss mine out in the fucking driveway and run it over with my car. But I won't.
Who will tell me the weather?
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