The Greatest Visitor Comments in Pointless Venture's History

 

My audience, presumably.

Pointless Venture doesn't have much of an audience. We get about 500 to 1000 visits a month, and most of those are people accidentally stumbling upon the site while looking for dinosaur porn or tips on how to get your Stacy back from a Tyrone. Still, we get some good comments from those stragglers, and I'd thought I'd rank them because why the fuck not?

Numero Uno: "Came across this in 2020. Hope you got covid and died, pointless blogger." From Mike, in reference to this post I wrote ripping conservative dickhead and former Red Sox's pitcher Curt Schilling. Jesus, Mike, it seems I really hit a nerve. When I said that Curt Schilling believes that using only 10 percent of his brain will get him into an exclusive heaven club where he can molest angels and eat cheese coneys with his bare feet, did I offend you? Well if I did, then fuck you! Seriously though, this made me laugh. Joke's on you Mike: I have not yet gotten Covid and died. Crossing my fingers, though.

Numero Dos: "I love you Johnny! I loved you as a player and I love you as a commentator. You’re the best!" From Shira Sand, in reference to this article about former Philly outfielder John Kruk's advanced tips on competitive eating. I like to think that Shira really believed that John Kruk wrote for Pointless Venture, and that one of his advanced eating tips is to "stuff a bunch of junk into a cup and time myself as I dig in." If it sounds true, it's gotta be, right? Keep on believing, Shira. John will knock off Kobayashi one of these days.

Numero Tres: "Nate, I agree with most of what you said here, but I wanted to point out a flaw in your analysis of your second point. The problem with Luke's turn isn't his "moment" of weakness, it's his determination that Ben Solo was irredeemable prior to that. The farm boy that gave DARTH VADER three movies worth of credit and was willing to die for it at the hands of Palpatine decided that Ben Solo, his nephew, was irredeemably turned so much so that he was stalking through his room at night watching him sleep with a lightsaber drawn. That is what is problematic about Luke's turn. It was hardly a "moment of weakness". Otherwise, most of the other complaints I've seen center around the contrivance that Holdo didn't inform anyone about her plan. Specifically not Poe. Had she done so, she prevents the entire conflict -- specifically the 100% unnecessary Prequel-esque casino scenes (which, even in a decent movie, accounted for its low points). Those two criticisms: Luke's predetermination of Ben Solo's wickedness and the plot contrivance that Holdo keeps the escape plan a big secret, I think, are worthy criticisms of an otherwise great film. My son (he's 8) literally gasped when Kylo killed Snoke. That's who this movie was for... not the theorycrafters. Good work, buddy. I hope you're well." From Unknown, commenting on my defense of the Last Jedi. This is the kind of comment we like to see here at Pointless Venture. You hear that, Ad Bot? If you're not hoping that I die from a deadly disease, then at least have the decency to critique my posts and wish me well. Thank you, Unknown. You're a decent internet person.

Numero Quatro: "Nice article dude. But everyone knows lifting legs is a waste of time. Your best gains come from doing low weight / high rep bicep curls 1 week before Spring Break." From Kalif, responding to my post on Squatting Every Day: Fifty Days In. Kalif is totally right here. High rep biceps curls are the shit for keeping your elbows healthy, as well as impressing the girls/boys on spring break, which is the only reason I lift weights.

Numero Cinco: "oh god. all speeches are now limited to either a thumbs up or thumbs down, with thumbs up being mandatory." From Unknown, posting on my guide to writing a best man speech. Well, Unknown, you've given yourself away, at least in this instance. I did a good job on that speech! Sure, your brother in law stole my thunder with his silly song, but it was a good wedding. Someday you may speak to me again.

Numero Seis: "BEST ADULT DATING SITE HORNY EBONY FEMALES HORNY COUGARS HORNY AMATEUR FEMALES GIRLS HOOKUP GAY HOOKUP SITE VIEW GIRL CAMS" From seanjames172, commenting on an entry in the Select Farmers Only series. Need I say more? That's everything I like in one easy link!