Wednesday, June 25, 2025

New Music: A Picture In My Mind

 

A 70's style singer-songwriter ballad that's currently sitting at 7 views on Youtube. There's just so much out there that you're basically pissing into the void whenever you upload a video or post a blog. Am I bitter? Ehh, I don't know. The times, they are a changing. I know that I've improved drastically as an artist and that I'm capable of producing art that would amaze my younger self. I've been very lucky in life, so my dearth of success as an artist is okay. At least, I'm at peace with it right now.

Monday, June 16, 2025

MAGA Explained by The Personalities of the Gang from It Is Always Sunny in Philadelphia

 

The Idiot

Idiocy is one of the defining attributes of the Make America Great Again movement. From brain-worm addled RFK undermining our vaccine expertise to ketamine-addicted Elon Musk accidentally firing half of our nuclear weapons administration, being stupid enough to believe and spread conspiracy theories is perhaps the cornerstone of this abhorrent ideology. Trump's entire economic policy seems to have been personally concocted by Charlie Kelly himself. Ask Trump to explain a tariff. Hell, ask him who his top bird law professional is, and I guarantee he will pull a name out of that vapid abyss he calls a brain. The idiot is nothing but confident, because he's too stupid to realize how dumb he really is. Perhaps Trump is an abortion survivor as well? I know Stephen Miller certainly is.


 The Psychopath

Trump's Chief of Staff Stephen Miller is a fascist obsessed with deporting immigrants. Homeland Security Secretary Kristi Noem bragged about shooting her dog. Elon Musk's DOGE eliminated USAID, which will likely lead to the deaths of millions of people. Being a psychopath seems to be a requirement to work for Trump, who also shares many of the symptoms of the disorder, from his superficial charm, manipulativeness, lack of empathy, promiscuity, and impulsive behavior. Also like Dennis Reynolds, Trump has a long history of sexual assault. Oh, and he buried his ex-wife Ivanka on one of his golf courses, which is a very Reynolds thing to do.

The Child

If you asked me to describe the mental age of most of the MAGA movement, I'd say 14-year old manchild, e.g, Ronald McDonald. Read any of Trump's Tweets or take a good long look at Elon Musk (I'm sorry) or JD Vance, and you'll recognize the self-delusion, blind misogyny, and mean-spiritedness of your average juvenile delinquent. Always the habitual liar, Trump approaches the truth just like Mac--as a vehicle for self-aggrandizement rather than an objective fact. "The cost of eggs has went down 93, 94 percent!" claimed Trump, right after eggs hit a record high in March. I bet Trump thinks he knows karate too.


    The Narcissist 

What does MAGA really care about? Itself of course! From trying to back us out of NATO to humiliating Zelensky to taking a jet from Qatar, everything Trump and his allies do is for their perceived benefit and not that of the America people. If you want to get into Trump's good graces, flatter him or give him money like Elon did. Sweet Dee uses people to make her feel better about herself because she has no friends. Rickety Cricket is more or less you and me, unfortunately. Hopefully the average American doesn't end up homeless and addicted to drugs!


 The Grifter

You know what really unites the Gang? Their penchant for grift. For MAGA, the grift is life itself. Trump loves cryptocurrency, despite not knowing what it is (creating a federal crypto reserve, lol!) and his entire career in both politics and business has been a grift. Did you know that the producers of the Apprentice had to renovate Trump Tower because it was such a dump? How did the son of a multimillionaire convince working-class America that he was their lord and savior? By being racist, of course! Trump is Frank Reynold, and Frank Reynold is the spirit of MAGA. Sweatshops, selling out, and living the trash life for all! We are all fringe class now, baby! Dr. Mantis Toboggan is running America, and he's neither a real doctor or an actual mantis, and like the recipients of Frank's schemes, we're all the worse for his leadership. This country has certified donkey-brains.

Thursday, June 5, 2025

Video Game Review: Doom: The Dark Ages


 Doom: The Dark Ages is id Software's third game in their reboot trilogy that started with 2016's Doom. Technically a prequel, The Dark Ages shows what the Doom Slayer (uuggghh) was up to with his pals the Night Sentinels before he was sealed in a sarcophagus and opened in the first game. The tonal shift that occurred in Doom Eternal is back; unlike in Doom 2016, the narrative vibe is more Saturday morning cartoon than grindhouse horror rip and tear. And that's okay, I guess--John Carmack himself stated that a story in a video game is like a story in a porno--but the first game in the new trilogy hit the proverbial nail on the head so well with its contempt for bullshit narrative (the Slayer interrupts a droning monologue on how to carefully remove a piece of tech by just ripping the fucking thing out of the console) that it's ironic how far id have abandoned that approach. There's a turret setpiece, multiple giant Mech fights, and a cybernetic dragon to ride on in The Dark Ages, along with cutscenes featuring po-faced musclemen droning on about plot details no one in their right mind will care about. However, nobody is here for the story, and what's really notable is that The Dark Ages has pivoted its combat loops from Doom Eternal, which was a significant complication compared 2016's Doom. You no longer have to juggle armor, health, and ammo with the flame belch, glory kill, and chainsaw respectively, for fodder enemies will drop all three consumables when they die if you are low. Through the upgrade system, you'll eventually unlock a armor drop ability for the shotgun, as well as health drops for the ravager skull weapon, and an ammo drop for the mace. That's right, a mace--The Dark Ages's main selling point this time around is a melee system that features a throwable chainsaw shield that can parry projectiles back at the demons. The shield is a hoot, I will admit, and parrying doesn't feel that out of place in a Doom game, although fodder enemies probably shouldn't emit projectiles, since it's a little too easy to die from some little bastard spawning behind you as you battle the big baddies. The arsenal has also been tweaked, with two weapons of each type located in each slot. For example, you have two plasma rifles: the accelerator, which is inaccurate but fast-firing; and the cycler, which is slower but emits shock damage that can travel from enemy to enemy. Although all the weapons are useful and cool, you'll find yourself gravitating back to the basic shotgun for its armor shedding ability, as well as the plasma cycler, which just destroys mobs. The skull weapons (ravager and pummeler) are also good for crowd control, and the chainshot destroys armor, which really comes in handy. The super-shotgun, rocket launcher, grenade launcher, and nail gun weapons were used sparsely in my playthrough. As for the enemies, they have also been redesigned to fit the medieval theme. There are armored versions of the hellknight, macubus, and arachnotron, all of which need to have their armor heated up by damage and then busted off with either a melee shot, a shield throw, or a blow from the chainshot. It's a fun and challenging system, but not quite the FPS chess from Doom Eternal. While I liked Eternal, I think the Ancient Gods DLC pushed that combat system as far as it could go. Doom was never about difficulty, a la Dark Souls, and The Dark Ages represents a return to a more manageable challenge, although you can really customize and crank up the difficulty, if you're that sort of masochist.

The level design is pretty good, with the Night Sentinel maps being the worst and the Hell and Lovecraft-influenced ones being the best. Spoiler: Cuthulu himself makes an appearance and you even get to kick his ass, that is, after you battle your way out of his guts. Giant monster, Giger-influenced tentacles, non-Euclidean geometry--The Dark Ages has some creative imagery and wonderfully grotesque aesthetics comparable to Eternal's ruined cityscapes. Ray-tracing is mandatory for the game, although its effects were pretty understated, which is probably why it runs so well. With most settings close or maxed out, The Dark Ages manages a frame rate of around 70 to 80 frames per second on an RTX 3080 at 1440p using DLSS Quality upscaling. It doesn't seem to be in any way CPU-bound, and unlike your average Unreal Engine title, frame time graphs are smooth with not a stutter or hitch in sight. This is a nice-looking game that runs well, a true rarity in the PC triple-A space lately (I'm thinking of Oblivion Remastered and Spider-man 2, two titles I've played this year that have their share of performance issues). The Dark Ages might not be the best of the series, but it's a really good single-player FPS, and you got to hand it to id Software for changing things up again instead of simply putting out Doom Eternal 2

Screenshots below:

















    

New Music: A Picture In My Mind

  A 70's style singer-songwriter ballad that's currently sitting at 7 views on Youtube. There's just so much out there that you...