Batman prowls the streets, searching for criminals that deserve the swift fists of justice. As he swings from roof top to roof top, a mantra is heard, barely comprehensible, yet said with vigor. "Fraud, fraud, fraud!" he mutters, eyes red, slivers of spittle flying from his lips. Momentarily perched on a gargoyle above a coffee shop, he sees a younger couple walk out onto the street, soy lattes in hand. With a bestial roar, Batman drops down before them, arms spread wide as though he means to crush them both in a titanic embrace.
"Who the fuck did you vote for!" he screams, grabbing the man by his lapels. "Did you chose to make America socialist again, you curly haired poofter?"
The woman throws her coffee right at Batman's face, causing him to drop the man and clutch his eyes. As the couple flees in terror, another figure emerges from the shadows to loom over the disabled Batman.
"You need some help?" asks Robin.
"Motherfucking communists blinded me," mumbles Batman, removing a Bat-hankie from his utility belt to wipe his face.
"I see you're not handling the election results very well," replies Robin.
"Fraud! Democrats cheated!" says Batman.
"Yeah, the Republican state government of Georgia cheated in favor of Joe Biden. If they cheated, don't you think they would've kept the Senate? There have been zero cases of fraud. Trump's lawsuits keep getting thrown out of court. You have to accept the inevitable. Trump will not get another four years."
"I don't have to accept shit! I make my own goddamn reality, you understand that? What Batman says is, is. And I'll be damned if I'll accept a socialist running the country."
"Joe Biden, socialist?" Robin laughs. "It's almost as if you don't understand what the word 'socialism' means."
"It means everything that is wrong with this country," snorts Batman. "Transgenders. Obamacare. School lunches without wholesome processed food."
"When the Right talk about socialism, they want you to think about an authoritarian boogeyman who will take all your money. They don't want you to think about Medicaid, Social Security, Medicare, or the Affordable Care Act. Hell, any government program is technically socialism. Rich people like you have somehow convinced poor white people to vote against their own interests, mainly by appealing to their emotions and prejudices."
"Goddamnit, Robin, you should be arrested for treason," says Batman, removing a batarang from his belt.
"We live in a representative democracy. There's nothing in the Constitution that says I have to vote for a capitalist oligarchy."
"Smarty-pants commie word soup," says Batman. "Nothing you said makes any sense."
"That's because you've spent the last four years in an echo chamber totally divorced from reality," says Robin. "You're attacking people outside coffee shops because you see monsters everywhere. Your fellow Americans are not the bad guys, Bruce."
"I get to say who's an American, not you, you pampered pansy!"
"I'm beginning to think that you don't understand American values," says Robin. "Then I remember that you are a vigilante who operates outside the legal system so that you can beat up the lower dregs of society with your fists."
"That's the legacy I bequeathed to you! You're supposed to take up my mantle!" screams Batman, now out in the middle of the street. Cars honk and swerve around him, but Batman continues to yell and wave his arms like a madman.
"I reject it," says Robin. "I'm retiring as a crime fighter to pursue a career in environmental law."
"Fuuuuccckkkkkkkkkk!" yells Batman as an Escalade flips him over the windshield. He bounces off the next car and crashes into a bicyclist before coming to rest next to a drain. As he lies in the gutter, moaning and crying inconsolably, Robin retreats back into the shadows, leaving the past behind.
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